Monday, October 6, 2014

Andy Borowitz

TODAY 10:38 AM

G.O.P. Leader: Five Million Forced Back to Work Under Obama



WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—In a blistering indictment of the Administration's economic policies, the chairman of the Republican National Committee has accused President Obama of forcing five million Americans back to work since he took office, in 2009.

"When President Obama took office, there were five million Americans at home all day who are now, sadly, not at home," said Reince Priebus, on Sunday's edition of "Meet the Press." "They have to go to work five days a week and they're mad as hell about it."

He said that he expected G.O.P. candidates in the midterm elections to hammer away at the President's greatest vulnerability, which he called "the ugly side of employment."

"You don't take five million Americans, uproot them from their families, and make them leave their homes for eight hours a day," Priebus said. "This isn't a dictatorship. This is America."

He added that the President's failure on this issue has helped sharpen the Republican Party's message to voters. "If you're sick and tired of employment, vote for us," he said.

I am a misanthrope and yet utterly benevolent, have more than one screw loose yet am a super-idealist who digests philosophy more efficiently than food.
-- Alfred Nobel

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