SATIRE FROM THE BOROWITZ REPORT
TRUMP SAYS HE DOES NOT KNOW JARED KUSHNER VERY WELL
By Andy Borowitz 11:45 A.M.
TAORMINA, Italy (The Borowitz Report)—Donald J. Trump on Saturday accused the media of exaggerating his relationship with Jared Kushner, asserting that "I don't know him very well."
"He's someone I would see around the office and who, I guess, was working for me," Trump told reporters on the last leg of his foreign trip. "Beyond that, I couldn't tell you much about him."
Trump acknowledged that he had spoken to Kushner at times during the 2016 campaign. "I'd pass him in the hall and say hello," he said. "He seemed like an O.K. person. I never got much of a sense of the guy."
When asked whether Kushner might have had improper contact with Russian spies during the transition, Trump said, "I couldn't tell you if that's the kind of thing he'd do. You really should ask someone who knows him."
Trump refused to answer further questions about Kushner's possible legal difficulties, saying only, "I wish Garrett well."
Patriotism is not a short and frenzied outburst of emotion but the tranquil and steady dedication of a lifetime.
- Adlai Stevenson