Andy Borowitz

For the past two days I had no internet service.  Long story short, I had Apple Help (for my airport express base station) and Time Warner Cable on the line from 9 am to 5 pm, and nothing worked.  Went to bed last night, but awoke early, like 4 am....thinking about cable networking from my TWC coax through my system to my airport router.   A light went on, and I recalled that underneath my pile of cables in the back of my "entertainment" case, I had a Netgear Router, through which my internet feed had to pass.  I was given an additional modem for my Internet signal from TWC yesterday afternoon, to work me through until a TWC tech could come on Friday  (problem started on Monday).   My system now has two separate modems from TWC (one for phone and a new one for Internet), I also have two routers (Netgear and Airport Express).   If you don't get the cabling right....it does not work.  SO - ..... I did not relay any news, even thought I have an iPad, but it is impossible to cut and paste draft stuff and email to groups.   So, here is Andy.   The news about the GeeOpie's serious problems right now, kind of made up for my frustrations.   And, so it goes.....Hi Ho !

JUNE 11, 2014

MORNING AFTER TEA PARTY WIN, HOUSE G.O.P. PROPOSES END TO SOCIAL SECURITY, RETURN TO CHILD LABOR, GUN RIGHTS FOR PETS

POSTED BY ANDY BOROWITZ

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—The morning after Tuesday's stunning Tea Party victory in Virginia, House Republicans unveiled a sweeping new legislative agenda, proposing an end to Social Security, a return to child labor, and unprecedented gun rights for pets.

"The Republican Party is the party of common sense," said House Speaker John Boehner (R-Ohio). "And such common-sense proposals as electronic ankle bracelets for immigrant babies and a barbed-wire fence with Canada are long overdue."

Rep. Paul Ryan (R-Wisconsin) echoed Speaker Boehner's sentiments as he touted his signature legislation, "to put Americans under the age of twelve back to work."

"Instead of spending all day playing with Xboxes, our kids should be in factories assembling them," he said.

As for what is perhaps the most controversial G.O.P. proposal, guaranteeing gun rights for pets, Boehner said, "It's clear that the authors of the Second Amendment meant it to apply to all mammals. All our new law says is, if you have four legs and a tail, you get a gun."

When asked about future relations between House Republicans and President Obama, Boehner did not mince words. "If the President thinks he's going to get the kind of cooperation and flexibility he's gotten out of us for the past six years, he's kidding himself," he said. "The honeymoon is over."

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Juan
 

I tried being reasonable, I didn't like it.

-- Clint Eastwood