Thursday, April 12, 2012

Things to Have Known - 12 April

You may have noticed that I did not find much of any cartoon yesterday that was funny.   Although this is not a drawing, does it make up for it?:

APRIL 12, 2012

Charles Manson Denied Parole, Effectively Ending His Bid for Republican Presidential Nomination

Clears Path for Romney

KINGS COUNTY, CA (The Borowitz Report) – Serial killer Charles Manson was denied parole yesterday, effectively ending his bid for the 2012 Republican presidential nomination.

With Mr. Manson no longer a contender, the path appears to be clear for former Massachusetts Governor Mitt Romney to become the party's nominee.

Perhaps in recognition of this development, Mr. Romney unveiled a new campaign slogan today: "Sorry, But You Have No Other Choices Now."

As for the rest of the GOP field, former Pennsylvania Senator Rick Santorum suspended his campaign this week, saying that he wanted "to spend more time with the voices in my head."

And former House Speaker Newt Gingrich wrote a $500 check on an account that had no money in it, in the first sign that he might be qualified to be President.

Elsewhere, a Fox News spokesman blasted a mole who had previously worked for the network: "At Fox News we have zero tolerance for someone who tells the truth."


"Somebody's boring me. I think it's me."

       -- Dylan Thomas

"There's no secret about success. Did you ever know a successful man who didn't tell you about it?" 
       -- Kin Hubbard
"The most erroneous stories are those we think we know best - and therefore never scrutinize or question." 
       -- Stephen Jay Gould
"My favorite thing about the Internet is that you get to go into the private world of real creeps without having to smell them." 
       -- Penn Jillette
"Education's purpose is to replace an empty mind with an open one." 
       -- Malcolm Forbes

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