Monday, September 28, 2026

Andy Borowitz

Adding my frustration this morning to an outbound message.   Question....do you know about Trump using taxpayer funds to produce and air a very fascist campaign on TV.   Yes, he has this very Trumpian message, and it ends with a caption "paid by the U.S, government".    Okay, plenty of observers are saying this is illegal and the Constitution does not allow it....    Okay, but WHO is actually preparing action to impeach the SOB for this and other illegal acts?   The WHO is our representatives in Congress......and so far all I hear and see is  stuff like " naughty naugthy; bad boy; it's illegal....etc"

The Borowitz Report borowitzreport@substack.com
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4:16 AM (6 hours ago)
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Brendan Smialowski/AFP via Getty Images

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—In an unprecedented attack on two prominent integers, on Monday Donald J. Trump banned the numerals 2 and 9 after his approval rating dropped to 29.

“Two and nine have treated me very unfairly,” said Trump, calling the numbers “low I.Q.”

Going forward, sources said, the White House will report Trump’s approval rating in base 3, which means that 29% will convert to 1002%.

Trump hinted darkly that his war on numbers might just be getting started, alleging that the entire numerical system “was invented by Arabs who hate America.”





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Juan Matute
R.B.R.
C.C.R.C.


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