Andy Borowitz

Trump Taps George Santos to Head Dept. Of Labor Statistics

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	Forwarded this email? Subscribe here for more Trump Taps George Santos to Head Dept. Of Labor Statistics Aug 4   READ IN APP   Kevin Dietsch/Getty Images WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—In one of the most stunning political comebacks in American history, on Monday Donald J. Trump picked the disgraced former congressman George Santos to lead the Department of Labor Statistics. "This is such an honor," Santos told reporters. "I really didn't think I'd get pardoned before Ghislaine." The new DLS chief hit the ground running, revising upward the job figures from every month of Trump's presidency. "The American economy added a million new jobs in May and a billion new jobs in June," Santos declared. "President Trump is creating jobs like crazy—he even gave one to Pete Hegseth." The unprecedented job growth has boosted Trump's approval rating, which Santos said currently stands at 140 percent.

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