Monday, May 7, 2018

Andy Borowitz


Trump Removes Giuliani from Legal Team by Naming Him New White House Doctor

Photograph by Jabin Botsford / The Washington Post / Getty


WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—In a move that has stirred controversy in both legal and medical circles, Donald J. Trump removed Rudy Giuliani from his legal team on Monday by naming him the new White House doctor.

The decision to appoint the former New York mayor to such a key medical position raised eyebrows, in no small part because Giuliani would become the first White House doctor in history not to possess a medical degree.

But, in an official White House briefing to announce the decision, the press secretary, Sarah Huckabee Sanders, pushed back against the criticism of Giuliani's nonexistent medical credentials. "Rudolph Giuliani is every bit as qualified to be a doctor as he is to be a lawyer," she said.

Dr. Giuliani hit the ground running in his new job, immediately scheduling an hour-long appearance on Sean Hannity's Fox News program to discuss the state of Trump's health.

"Is the President's mental health good?" Giuliani asked on the air. "Maybe it is, maybe it isn't. Is he all there? You really have to define what you mean by 'all.' If he's out of his mind, so what? That's nobody's business. The important thing is, I'm on TV again talking a lot, and I've never felt so alive."



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Juan
 
Patriotism is not a short and frenzied outburst of emotion but the tranquil and steady dedication of a lifetime.
- Adlai Stevenson





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