Friday, April 13, 2018

Andy Borowits



Amazon Apologizes for Shipping Ten Thousand Copies of Comey's Book to White House

Photograph by Saul Loeb / AFP / Getty

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Calling it a "regrettable accident," Amazon apologized on Thursday for shipping ten thousand advance copies of James Comey's book, "A Higher Loyalty," to the White House.

Cartons of the book arrived early Thursday morning and kept coming throughout the day, until stacks of the book clogged virtually every hallway and office in the building.

Reportedly, Donald J. Trump was so incensed by the book situation that he screamed at Mike Pence while the Vice-President was in the middle of praising him, one source said.

The White House press secretary, Sarah Huckabee Sanders, called any speculation that Trump had ordered Comey's book "absurd," adding, "The President does not order reading material."

Jeff Bezos, the founder of Amazon, said that he had "absolutely no idea" how the ten thousand Comey books made their way to the White House, but advised Trump to follow the procedures on the Amazon Web site for returning unwanted merchandise.

"You can print up the return labels at home," he said. "The books should be picked up and out of there in two weeks, three weeks, max."

Bezos said that shipping the ten thousand books back to the company's warehouse would not be overly costly for Amazon. "We get an amazing deal on postage," he said.


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Juan
 
Patriotism is not a short and frenzied outburst of emotion but the tranquil and steady dedication of a lifetime.
- Adlai Stevenson





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