NEW YORK (The Borowitz Report)—A largely forgotten man sought attention on Wednesday night before returning to obscurity on Thursday, according to reports.
The man, whom many Americans had difficulty placing, was making a desperate bid to remind people of his existence, experts believe.
His efforts were somewhat successful, as his widely reported outburst caused people across the country to rack their brains to try to remember who he was.
After briefly attempting to recall where they had seen the man before, many people gave up and moved on with their days, but for others, the desperate man's remarks left a bitter aftertaste.
"There is no excuse for making comments like those, no matter who you are," Tracy Klugian, forty-seven, of Springfield, Missouri, said. "Who is he again?"
Still others showed concern for the man, and expressed hope that, instead of future bids for attention, he would find fulfillment in crafting or some other harmless hobby.
Just cause you got the monkey off your back doesn't mean the circus has left town.