WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report) — Moments after President Obama said he would allow insurers to continue health plans that were to be cancelled under the Affordable Care Act, leading Republicans blasted the President for agreeing with an idea that they had supported.
"It's true that we've been strongly in favor of Americans being allowed to keep their existing plans," said House Speaker John Boehner (R-Ohio). "But now that the President is for it, we're convinced that it's a horrible idea."
House Majority Leader Eric Cantor (R-Virginia) went further in ripping the President, calling Mr. Obama's tactic of adopting ideas proposed by him and fellow Republicans "beneath contempt."
"The President should be aware that any future agreeing with us will be seen for what it is: a hostile act," he said.
Minutes later, White House spokesman Jay Carney helmed a hastily called press conference, hoping to stem the quickly escalating coöperation scandal.
"The President understands that he has offended some Republicans in Congress by agreeing with them," Mr. Carney said. "He wants to apologize for that."
But far from putting an end to the controversy, the President's apology drew a swift rebuke from another congressional Republican, Senator Ted Cruz (R-Texas), who called it a "blatant provocation."
"If the President is going to continue agreeing with us and apologizing to us, he is playing with fire," he warned.
We have, I fear, confused power with greatness. -- Stewart Udall